We’re going international on today’s program. Charlie and Dennis travel across the pacific ocean (figuratively) to dine at Osaka Japanese Bistro. Charlie has visited Osaka enough to have tried almost everything on the menu. However, this is Dennis’ first visit. Osaka is a local Japanese owned and operated restaurant that features authentic dishes from Japan. And it’s not just the food that’s authentic. The experience is quite realistic to the culture as well. Charlie and Dennis removed their shoes before entering the Tatami dining room. And they were seated on what Charlie describes as… Yoga mats. Even the waitresses are Japanese according to Charlie. This leads into a bashing moment for Dennis regarding our least favorite restaurant, Blueberry Hill and their soulless, depressed servers that clearly are only alive because the butter knives aren’t sharp enough to slit their wrists.
Before the meal began they were served delicious green tea. Dennis, who at the time was recovering from a bout of laryngitis had high praises for this tea and its soothing effects on his tattered throat.
Charlie ordered a number of things from the menu including broiled fresh water squid, some miso soup and various sushi rolls. Dennis fumbled with his chop sticks as his meal arrived first featuring a house salad he described as being better than most as well as some “911 Rolls” he was expecting to be hot, but were pleasantly mild with just the right amount of spice.
During their dinner they take the time to praise the green tea once again as well as the Sake. The fellas reminisce about their younger days at asian buffets where less desirable body parts of the sea food was offered. Dennis wasn’t a taker, but Charlie was. Tentacles, eye balls, whatever, Charlie was game.
At some point during dinner we learn that Dennis carries a personal fork for emergency grubbing situations. And he has visions that he’ll die by being impaled by it as he trips while running to the dinner table. Perhaps that dinner will be concocted in the deep frier that Dennis proclaims he stole from Wal-Mart in an adjacent sentence.
After these revelations from Dennis the Nabeyaki Udon arrives. This noodle soup has shrimp tempura, chicken, egg and vegetables in a broth. And in typical Who Asked You? fashion the fact that the noodles are huge, warm and wet leads to a couple of juvenile jokes about having them inside Dennis. It wouldn’t belong on our website without at least one penis, sex, fart or fat joke.
In the end Charlie polishes off his remaining tentacles and Dennis drops his chop sticks on the table in a moment of pure bliss to be finished using them. And they both agree Osaka is worth the few extra dollars. The food is high quality and satisfying. It doesn’t leave you bloated or hungry on the way home. And if you’re trying to get a chick in the sack, apparently the gents think it’s a good place to woo her.
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Osaka Japanese Bistro is located at:
Osaka Japanese Bistro
4205 West Sahara Ave.
Las Vegas, NV 89102
Osaka Japanese Bistro
10920 South Eastern Ave.
Henderson, NV 89052
Visit their website for more information: www.lasvegas-sushi.com