Who Asked You?

Posts Tagged ‘preview’

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If you’re staring at this week’s show title wondering if that’s a snack in the food aisle at your local adult store, it is not. It’s Channing Tatum’s new nickname. Why would we call him that? Please see the episode titled, “The Beck-ening” which contains one of our more memorable stories still brought up from time to time. Why are we talking about Channing Tatum? Because he’s got several movies coming out this year including G.I. JOE: RETALIATION and 21 JUMP STREET. Both of these films sound awful.
Charlie can count his lucky stars he slept too late and missed this week’s program because it’s not just reboots of 80′s TV series and toy-turned-movie sequel blandness we have to look forward to in the theater this year… oh no, there’s also sequels to films that didn’t need them, sequels to films that shouldn’t have had a first one to begin with, a movie based on the Navy SEALS mission that killed Osama bin Laden, more comic book flicks, a 3D version of a certain chainsaw-wielding wacko who goes on a massacre, a sequel to a comic book movie whose original was really bad, Daniel Radcliffe ditches the wand, the CLASH OF THE TITANS remake gets an unneeded second, Johnny Depp stars in another Tim Burton film, Tim Burton produces a movie based on one of his first stop-motion shorts, Hasbro continues to sell its soul, Will Smith insures his is never coming back, a guy named ‘Webb’ will give us his emo-take on THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN, Bruce Wayne slips on his cape for the last ‘good’ time — although DC is probably already planning Batman’s reboot after Nolan calls it quits, you’ll be demanding a recall on Collin Farrell’s version of TOTAL RECALL, Stallone and friends will come back to blow stuff up and blow people’s heads off, the fight against the Umbrella Corp. will continue, Universal’s monsters will be raped a second time in the ass after contracting Hepatitis from VAN HELSING, RED DAWN will also see the dawn of its reboot, KNOCKED UP will get a spin-off, a Hansel and Gretel movie will come out this year with a plot so ridiculous the guys are convinced I made it up. We did that on the 2010 look ahead and it was just as difficult back then to tell the real from the fake. I swear to you, I did not make any of these up this time around. These films are all real!
Somewhere between the messes of movies being rattled off I run out of Sam Adams Black and Brew (my new favorite of theirs having tried it for the first time on today’s show) and we learn what pig semen smells like from Sheena, Charlie’s female fill-in.

SHOW LINKS:
Sheena Johnson on IMDb
Movie Insider’s 2012 Theatrical Releases
Download EPISODE 157 – The Beck-ening

New Releases for Tuesday, January 3rd:
Justified (Season 2)
Contagion (Two-Disc Blu-ray/DVD Combo + UltraViolet Digital Copy)
Alfred Hitchcock Presents (Season 5)
I Don’t Know How She Does It
Serendipity [Blu-ray]
Don’t Be Afraid Of The Dark
Shark Night
Marley & Me: The Puppy Years
She’s All That [Blu-ray]
Red: Werewolf Hunter

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In a rush to get to his spot moments before we went on-air Dennis’ knee had a rather displeasing encounter with the edge of a table. He’d find no comfort in a sip of all-natural Mountain Dew either. The pain in his knee and disdain on his taste buds was nothing compared to the ambient attitude of today’s show. A disagreement over TRON: LEGACY leads the program when a listener expresses their polar-opposite to ours opinion of the Disney sequel. From there things head south even more… month by month. You see, this week’s show is our annual look ahead at the theatrical releases Hollywood has planned for the entire year. Last year we called it “A Glance At The Gloom”, which hinted at the quality of films we were dealing with. Now that 2010 is over, it’s safe to say it was a pretty “gloomy” year at the box office. Films absent of any story or redeeming qualities reined at the box office. A strange paradox persists at ticket counters everywhere. The movies coming out of southern CA are crap, shit, garbage, manure, junk, crud and so on… yet people continue to flock to theaters and shell out $10 — $13 if it’s 3D — as though they all have a “I’ll give ‘em 1 more chance” mentality that never seems to run out. Comic book movies are bombing left and right, but when the next one comes out, the line to see it is out the door and around the corner.
This year will be no exception. There are a lot of sequels making their way to your local cineplex. So many of them undeserving of that “1 more chance”. The first film being so god-awful you wonder how a sequel got approved. Then you look at the numbers. Hollywood knows they’re shoveling silver-screen shit. But those 1 more chance-ers are making it easy to make bank.
So this year will bring us another SCREAM, another BIG MOMMA’S HOUSE, another X-MEN spin-off/sequel/prequel, another PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN, another…. you get the idea. An eerie silence falls over the Who Asked You? Crew the further into this hole… err.. I mean, list we go. By about mid June, early July, we’re speechless and the folks in the chat room are committing suicide. The puke button on the sound board is worn out and the taste left in our mouths is that of a little vomit. Better though, than all-natural Mountain Dew.

SHOW LINKS:
2011 Theatrical Movie Releases from MovieInsider.com

New Releases for Tuesday, January 4th:
Machete
Dinner for Schmucks
Big Love: The Complete Fourth Season
Coraline (2-Disc Combo: Blu-ray 3D/Blu-ray/DVD + Digital Copy)
Ricky Gervais Show (Season 1)
Case 39
The Last Exorcism
Rocky & Bullwinkle & Friends (Complete Series)
The Real Housewives of New Jersey (Season 2)
Blade Runner: The Final Cut [Blu-ray]

Here’s some cool game footage from the latest iteration of Mortal Kombat. New this time around, “X-Ray Fatalities.” Lets look at what happens to the bones and internal organs of our favorite combatants as they’re punched, kicked, sawed, impaled, sliced, ripped, smashed and gutted in the final moments of their lives.

My favorite fatality on this video is at 3:30…. Kung Lao wins!

New York? Really? They’re lost in New York? They go to New York City? Really? Because that plot has never been done before has it? Really? The Big Apple? The Smurfs go to New York? Really?

Jesus Smurfing Christ………

If you’re at all still interested, here’s some pictures of Hank Azaria as Gargamel.

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Okay… so you’re probably immediately wondering why there’s a homo-erotic depiction of Luigi to the left. It’s very simple. We talk about Luigi on today’s show. More specifically, the fact that he’s gotten a pretty raw deal over the years when it comes to having his own game. This was all spawned from me bringing up the newly-released “Super Mario Galaxy 2″ for the Nintendo Wii. In that game you’ll have the chance to play as Luigi on several levels. Besides the “New Super Mario Brothers Wii” video game, this is the first time Luigi has gotten to really stretch his legs legitimately in a Mario game for some time. Why then the gay-ish Luigi picture? Well no real reason I guess. Although, we do start and end this week’s episode with some varying Broke Trek memories. If you’ve never seen this Brokeback Mountain/Star Trek parody, you can watch it in the Show Links. And we do go into a tangent about Luigi being a slave. But not the kind of slave the picture is suggesting. So I guess that angle doesn’t really work… look, it’s a funny fuckin’ picture okay. Just look at it, chuckle and move on.
Besides the homosexual trek and Luigi getting the shaft we do have a few items of interest on the show. Apparently it is now against FCC regulations to even elude to a dirty word. Just ask the Parent’s Television Council. They know what’s best for us. And what’s best for us is NOT watching the new CBS comedy due out this fall called “Bleep My Dad Says” or “&$#% My Dad Says or, our preferred version, “Shit My Dad Says”. The Television Council for those who choose not to parent says it’ll bring lawsuits against any CBS affiliate who airs the show, or promotions for it too early in the evening. Looks like this Fall’s season is already shaping up to be “the shit”.
And we once again check back in on the master of giant fighting robots, pointless explosions and seizure-inducing lens flares to find out just what he’s been keeping busy with. And the answer is so shocking, so revolutionary and just so god-damned funny we can’t tell you here… you’ll have to tune in for it!
After the Bay banter it comes time to review the broadcast networks cancellation choices and to reflect on those new shows green lit and headed our way come September. It’s tough to judge how good a show will be from a single sentence description, but we do our best. I even manage to throw in a few fakes to spice things up, because to be honest, this new stew of network episodics is pretty bland. Many of their ingredients we’ve seen before and others we just don’t even want to taste.
Being the eternal optimists we are, Charlie not so much… Mike more than any other… we’d like to believe there’ll be something halfway decent to watch next season. Even if it means trudging through the monotonous. I guess Captain Kirk says it best when confronted with the complications of loving Mr. Spock in Broke Trek, “It’s a risk I’ll have to take.”

The Soap Box

SHOW LINKS:
Baja Fresh
Super Mario Galaxy 2 – Buy it here
Green Hornet Movie
Seth Rogan on IMDb.com
The PTC – A group of moronic fuddy-duddies with nothing better to do than ruin everyone’s good time.
Shit My Dad Says Twitter Feed
Buy Cop and a Half
MichaelBay.com
Megan Fox
Paramount
Transformers Official Movie Site
New Fall Shows/Schedules For: ABC, CBS, Fox and NBC

New Releases for Tuesday, May 25th:
True Blood (Season 2)
Dear John
The Road
Leverage (Season 2)
Spartacus (50th Anniversary Edition) [Blu-ray]
Seven Swords [Blu-ray]
Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood Part 1
Mystery Team
Bigger and Blackerer
Tupac: Live at the House of Blues [Blu-ray]